lent. again. already

i'm still excited from the nativity, and here it is lent, time to get ready for easter, as if one could be ready for such an astounding event.

the past several years my "lenten disciplines" have taken a different turn. partly this turn has been a gift, and partly it has been the result of a conscious dissatisfaction with lent as usual.

i mean, consider ash wednesday. we read the gospel. jesus tells us that we when we fast we are not to disfigure our faces, but to wash our face, that we appear not to fast. but we ash our faces. the for forty-six days we gosspin about what we have "given up for lent." giving up chocolate is popular with many of my friends. i always feel this reduces the resurrection to "o joy!, now i can ear chocolate easter bunnies."

the traditional prayer, fasting, and alms are very good disciplines, of course, but are best done secretly. the lenten discipline which came to me as a gift, however, does not seem to require secredy. in fact discussing it may be a helpful part of it. it is to take a lenten koan, to borrow a term from by zen buddhist buddies. a koan is a text to unriddle. my first lenten koan, from a. d. 2006, was the passage from the gospel according to john in which some greeks come to philip and say, "we would see jesus." philip tells andrew. andrew and philip tell jesus. jesus answers them, "the hour is come, that the son of man should be glorified. verily, verily, i say unto you, except a grain of wheat fall into the ground, it abideth alone: but if it die, it brings forth much fruit." on one level, a text as simple as possible. but, there are levels and levels.

this year my koan seems to be a bigger one: the book of the prophet ezekiel. this strange text has been haunting me since last june. there is a central part, the most in-your-face-perssonal part, in the second chapter:

"son of man, i send thee to the children of israel, to a rebellious nation . . . . i do send thee unto them; and thou shalt say unto them, thus sayeth the lord god. and they, whether they will hear, or whether they will fore bear . . . yet shall know there has been a prophet among them." (2:3-5)

i suspect this is ot only my koan, but the koan for all the church, as we look once again toward the biggest celebration of the resurrection of jesus christ of the whole year. do we, dare we, do i, dare i, share the words that are sweet as honey in our mouths, "alleluia! christ is risen! the lord is risen indeed! alleluia!" dare we go through the three days of death, the desolation of israel, that leads to the resurrection and the rebuilding of the temple that is ezekiel's vision and jesus' promise or do we just give up chocolate for forty-six days?